CLUTTER AND CHAOS {and How it affects our Relationships}

"My messy house is affecting my marriage."

"Being unorganized is taking away from the time I spend with my kids."

"I have piles of laundry to do this weekend, I don't have time to hang out with friends."

"I'm too embarrassed to invite friends and family over, my house is out of control."

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"Relationships are imperative for many different reasons such as increasing our emotional well

being, creating stability, learning how to be a good friend, having someone to count on and trust

in times of need and someone to vent to when we face challenges, and friends take away loneliness

and make us feel included."

says the huff post....

I decided to google the importance of relationships to get others perspective, and woah did that

post hit it on the nail! To me, this says that we can't afford to forfeit healthy relationships.

Before we go any further, let's all make the decision to not allow clutter and disorganization to

interfere with our relationship with the ones we love.

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How many times can you remember having to cancel on someone due to being overloaded with chores,

overwhelmed with clutter, or overstressed with cleaning?

Yes, I want you to actually pause and think about it....

Just then, you realized how much time you've given to the clutter and chaos in your life.

But I'm praying that after reading this blog, you make the conscientious decision to

TAKE YOUR LIFE BACK!

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Clutter

NOUN

1. a collection of things lying about in an untidy mass

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We've all seen it. Clutter can affect our relationships tremendously. Whether its bickering with

a spouse or constantly being frustrated with your children. The reality is most times we can't do it

all on our own. Don't beat yourself up! You’re working a full-time job, helping to take care of your

parents, taking care of your children, making time to be a great friend, trying to remain

actively involved in your church and having to make time for your significant other.

YOU'RE OVERWHELMED!

Now, this is not the time to scream to your spouse, " SEE, she agrees with me!"

Keep reading and let's figure out the best route you should take to gain control.

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Now, let me start off by saying that I am in no way discrediting the many reasons we all have for

getting behind on housework, the struggle it is to make time for work and family, and the constant

overwhelmedness of just trying to keep up with life! But it is my desire to show you how you can overcome it and take back control of your life!

I'm sure you've heard it before, TIME MANAGEMENT! Yeps, sometimes it's that simple.

I know, I know, there's just not enough time. But what if there was? I've learned that preparation is key.

Whether it's meal prep, making daily to-do lists, making grocery lists and planning meals in advance so you have exactly what you need to cook, picking out clothes in advance, and the list goes on and on.

Doing this has helped me tremendously with getting it all done and having such a demanding schedule. I

now make it my business to try and not let "time" control what I can get done in a day. I get a head start

on my day before the day even begins. Instead of lying in bed scrolling social media before I fall asleep,

I make my to do list for the next day and schedule out what I will eat the next day. I cannot go to bed without getting my clothes out, I won't make it on time! And I mean physically getting them out. I have even had to start trying it on somedays, curse the weight gain.........

This is also the time where I map out my social media posts, on each account, for the upcoming day. Being a serial entrepreneur and having to consistently post on all pages is a job in itself.

I hear you asking, "but how does this help me with my relationships?" While you're making those to-do

lists, write in an uninterrupted hour of homework and play time with the kids. That's right, actually write it in your schedule. Make it a point to prep dinner the night before or start dinner a little earlier so that

once you get the kids to bed you have more time with just you and your spouse. Plan that girls’ day in

advance. This will give you to time to arrange for a babysitter or time for you to make sure no other

responsibilities fall during that time.

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Let's pause here and remember that there are different types of clutter. The physical clutter taking over

your home is not the only one affecting your relationships. Sometimes it can be mental or time clutter.

Mental clutter can be the negative thoughts, worries, or the thoughts of past hurts. An overloaded,

cluttered brain is just as harmful as a cluttered home. Time clutter is something we're all guilty of. The

best way for me to describe time clutter is that you can't do it all. I am not sorry for telling you that

there are times where you have to say no! Let's practice:

"No, I can't pick up your shift so you can go out of town."

"No, I am not able to host your function."

"No, I don't have the time to make the dish you love for your potluck."

Did you notice that I didn't apologize? There's no need to. You're not saying no to be rude but you're

saying no during those times you honestly can't or, in reality, just don't want to, and that's okay, too.

Let's sum it up. Be realistic with your schedules and to-do lists. Don't overload it, but schedule things that you can actually accomplish. Don't take on extra tasks that will interfere with your already loaded

schedule. Of course, we help our friends and family when we can, but the reality is, sometimes we can't.

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Chaos

NOUN

1. complete disorder and confusion.

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All of this clutter and disorganization has caused chaos. Chaos on our jobs, chaos with our spouse, and

chaos in our relationships with our children. I don't have to tell you how unhealthy that is, you're living

in it.

Now the reality is time management will not always be the answer. There are days when you've planned

and prepped and life was still knocking you down. There are times where you will need to ask for help

from others, times where you may have to hire help in some areas. Maybe someone to come in and do

laundry or weeks where you have to order meals from Hello Fresh, and that's okay.......

Let's take 10 mins together and make a list of things we can do to take back our control. Write down all

the areas in which you've just about lost control in your life, areas where relationships have suffered, or

just areas where chaos has creeped in and taken over.

10..........

9.........

8........

7.......

6......

5....

4....

3...

2..

1.

What things came to mind? What areas could use a little work? How can you declutter your schedule to make more time for the ones you love? What can you let go of to help save you marriage?

Here comes the tough questions......

Are you ready?

Are you willing to put in the work?

Does it mean enough to you to make the necessary steps?

Let's seal this decision with a prayer.....

PRAYER